Category Archives: DerpCharts

Keeping Track of the Scandal 2016 Primary

Do you watch Scandal on ABC?

In the midst of seemingly constant breaks between small episode chunks, do you find yourself losing track of the primary?

I feel you. I made an infographic to help us keep track of the field as it currently stands. Who is running, against whom, and which characters support the candidates?

(click to enlarge)

Scandal

 

Brought to you by Jake eating fried chicken.

chicken

 


GOP Debate Bingo, Episode II: The Failsauce Ignites and Lights California’s Forests on Fire

Ladies and gents, if you don’t suffer from anxiety and have nothing better to do at 8pm EST (or even 6pm EST for the happy hour edition), why not enjoy round 2 of the GOP debates on CNN? Here’s a bingo card with which to entertain yourselves.

GOPDebateIIBingowatermarked


In advance of Thursday, I bring you GOP Debate Bingo

Don’t be afraid. Let the tomfoolery flow though you. Let it give you sustenance as you mark the debate progress with stickers on this custom debate bingo card. And “God Bless America.”
GOPDebateBingo


Anxiety Illustrated

GOTAnxietyPie


Sunday is Games of Thrones Night: Feelings Conveyed Through Charts

SANSA! Listen, girl, I have some qualms. Do you NOT recall the decision tree?


WesterosDecisionTree

Littlefinger1 Littlefinger2 Littlefinger3


Why Outlander is the Most Refreshing Show On TV Right Now

fantasyTV


The Law of Diminishing Returns, illustrated by Dragonball Z

DiminishingReturnsDBZ


“How do I brain?” The persistence of the willfully uninformed.

I love when vocal Republicans on Facebook broadcast the fact that they’re liberals through the issues they care about. “No, I’m just a Republican who believes social welfare programs are all grossly & negligently under-budgeted while money is wasted elsewhere.” Congratulations, you’re a modern Democrat. “No, no, no, I mean all our money goes abroad and to excessive immigration instead of helping the folks here at home!” Oh, well then let me revise that: you’re an idiotic modern Democrat. Let me google that for you…. Here we are. In under 2 seconds I have a pie chart of Fiscal Year 2010’s budget expenditures by department. Simply click to enlarge! Immigration Services falls under the Dept of Homeland Security, btw.

Fy2010_spending_by_category

 

“You see? Homeland Security is a huge piece of that pie!” Oh…okay, you think the Immigration office costs more than surveillance bunkers, the coast guard, or FEMA equipment. Ignorance was cute in the olden days, I guess, but OK, let me google that for you again…. Oh, in three seconds flat I have unearthed the FY 2010 Budget of the Dept of Homeland Security. Yeah, that Haitian assistance and backlogged Immigration paperwork is killing us.

Seriously, it takes people longer to write a derogatory Facebook post about falsehoods than it actually would take to learn about the falsehood. Ignorance is a cardinal sin in the Information Age. Ignorantly blind partisanship is bad enough, but willfully blind partisanship is just unfathomable to me. I essentially met someone whose logic is: If I gave a shit for long enough to learn about the issues I care about, I would feel differently about the issues I care about.

 

bridesmaids

 

So close, buddy! Better luck next election. Maybe someday you’ll cognitively get there.

 

 


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